Playing board games is like real life in a lot of ways. There are rules telling you how you're supposed to act and behave, you are often doing different tasks in competition or together with other people, and you usually have some goal that you're trying to achieve through various means. But board games conflict with this so called life thing in many, many ways too. In fact, you're often thrown into a new scenario at a moments notice where everything you know to be true is thrown out the window.
For example, when saving the world from deadly diseases in Pandemic, you must wait your turn to do anything that will help. Adding to that, when that time comes, you're only allowed to do four world saving things before passing the reins over. Four! I mean, regardless of the fact that there are diseases spiralling out of control, those are just the rules and there's nothing you can do about it. Finally, they tell you that getting from New York to Washington DC is as simple as getting from Tehran to Bahgdad, and I don't know about you but I've had a look at the news lately and I'm very sceptical about how accurate that statement is.
In this sense, us gamers are constantly taught new lessons that alter what we know about our current life. So I am here to help. I give you a plethora of wisdom which should hopefully help you in your future escapades, whether in our reality or elsewhere.
You don't have to know what your job is in order to do it successfully [Mascarade]
In the world of academia, publishing a theory you know to be false is common, even encouraged [Alchemists]
The fact that camels can store enough fat and water to last for weeks or months without drinking is fairly common knowledge, but what's less known is their ability to store up to four other full size camels up there too [Camel Up]
A village that has been burned down, ransacked and murdered is a celebratory event as long as there's at least one person left alive [Samurai Spirit]
The urban planning department in the town of Carcassonne is in a constant struggle to cope with the frequent and erratic changing of its layout, causing chaos for the residents who live there [Carcassonne]
However, the employment level of thieves, knights and monks who live there is at an all time high [Carcassonne]
Suicide, dizziness or mutual destruction is an inevitable fate for all dragons [Tsuro]
You cannot shoot somebody in the same room as you, unless you're an officer of the law [Colt Express]
Going out for dinner, but discover they only serve one helping of Tempura or two pieces of Sashimi? May as well have them spit in my face. Worthless garbage [Sushi Go]
If you are a law abiding citizen in Nottingham, the authorities are required to financially compensate you if they inconvenience you in any way [Sheriff of Nottingham]
When building manned spaceships, forget about safety, efficiency and even gaps in the hull. Speed of completion is the most important factor [Galaxy Trucker]
Should you launch said ship into space, don't worry about bringing everybody back. As long as you get a bit of sweet, sweet cargo nobody will question you [Galaxy Trucker]
Starving your family is sometimes the only way to get ahead of your neighbours [Stone Age]
If somebody gets more pudding than you, then there's usually no point having any at all [Sushi Go]
Does your front door lead right into a toilet? Is there a hallway in your house with fourteen doors where only two of them actually lead anywhere? Do you have a torture chamber and a bottomless pit in the basement? And what the hell is a dirt room for? Congratulations, you're building things the Ludwig way! [Castles of Mad King Ludwig]
Sometimes life will take a big dump on you, stick its middle finger up in your direction and have you believe that it has absolutely no meaning and everything you do is pointless [Fluxx]
I'm sure there are plenty more examples of this kind of strange logic out there, so if you have thought of any yourselves, please get in touch using our Twitter and Facebook pages using the hashtag #boardgamelogic. Alternatively, comment below, we would love to hear from you!